A HELENSBURGH man has spoken bravely about his 15-month fight to get himself back to a good place after he attempted to take his own life.

Jordan-Cayden Hamlin, who is transgender and identifies as male, jumped from the third floor of his flat in Helensburgh’s Drumfork Court on the morning of January 24, 2019.

“I had given up on myself,” the 22-year-old told the Advertiser, “That day I just opened the window and went for it.”

It wasn’t the first time he had attempted suicide but it was the most serious effort.

“My pal had been staying overnight,” he said, “and in the couple of days leading up to that I was stressed, I just felt like nobody cared.

“I know everybody does care now, definitely, but it was just the way I was feeling, being transgender, stuff was getting to me.

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“I had basically just given up. I did struggle with drink – sometimes I still do struggle with drink, but not as bad – and I’d had a drink that day.

“A couple of days before that I was wanting to jump out the window but I stopped myself. That day I just opened the window and went for it.”

Luckily, he says now, he landed on the grass.

“I was in absolute pain and couldn’t help shouting,” he said.

“Two guys came round because they thought they heard someone fighting. They worked for ACHA and they phoned 999, one of them gave me their hat because I love my hats.

“Other ACHA workers came and put a blanket over me and kept me warm until the ambulance came. My social worker Bobby also came.

“I was put on a spinal board and ended up at the RAH [in Paisley]. I was in hospital for three weeks.”

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After fracturing his back, Jordan wore a support brace for six weeks and attended physiotherapy in hospital while getting regular visits from social and care workers.

Fifteen months on and now fully recovered, he says he owes a debt of gratitude to those who came to his aid when he was at his most vulnerable.

“I’ll never be afraid to tell anybody my story,” he said.

“I look at it like, if you’re struggling, sometimes you have to go through the pain to get better and you should never be ashamed of that. It definitely does get better.

“A few weeks ago I went through a break-up and I have other stuff going on and I thought I was going to be a lot worse but I’m actually not doing too bad.

“I want to thank everyone for being there and I want to put my story out there to let people know that it does get better and it’s alright to reach out for help.

“When I was younger I was really embarrassed to reach out for help because I thought ‘What if I get judged?’

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“I still struggle to talk to people now but I am better. It is a lot easier to talk and never be ashamed of that. Help is out there, you’ve just got to accept it.”

Jordan, who has been involved with the care system since his early teenage years, said he thought he wasn’t going to be able to walk again after he jumped but small steps have put him in a much better place now.

He said: “A couple of months down the line I really struggled with it, I kept getting flashbacks. I just gave up on myself and it was the biggest thing I’ve ever put myself at risk of.

“It was the only option for me at the time. I couldn’t do anything else other than just end it all or want to really hurt myself. It was mainly my transgender stuff that was really getting to me.

"I just got up and went for it and didn’t think twice about it. I didn’t tell anyone that I was going to jump.

“I’d say I am doing a lot better. I still have my struggles like everyone does but I can sort of deal with them a bit better.

“I still need help, I’ve just gone through a break-up and I’ve struggled over the past week or so but I thought I was going to be worse.”

With his mental and physical health vastly improved, Jordan hopes by sharing his story he can help others overcome their struggles.

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“I just wanted to let it out and let people know that there is help out there, it’s alright to come forward and you should never, ever be ashamed.

“My main advice [to people in a similar situation] would be pick up the phone. It’s alright to try and get help and it’s alright not to be OK, even if you do have a downfall, it will get better.

"It might take a lot of time but it will get better, you’ve just got to let it.”

And he also gave a special mention to those who were there for him when he needed them.

“The workers were amazing. If it wasn’t for them I don’t know what would’ve happened and I couldn’t appreciate it any more.

"I feel as if I couldn’t thank them enough. I hope they read this and see it: Ashley, Shona [ACHA housing officers]; Bobby Wilson, Stacey [social workers]; the two ACHA workers and the paramedics as well.

“I could’ve been lying there for hours, I could’ve done more damage. I didn’t want to survive it but looking back I think ‘Oh my God, imagine if I did a lot worse’.

“I couldn’t be any more grateful and can’t thank them enough.”

* If you need someone to talk to, or have been affected by anything in this story, don’t be afraid to seek help. Call Samaritans, for free, any time of the day, on 116 123; Breathing Space on 0800 83 85 87, or phone 111.

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